Geek Redemption: What's Wrong with Being a Geek? How to Stop Being One Book

Just what is wrong with being a geek? Don't geeks at least all have jobs, and don't some of them get rich? Well, if there is really anyone out there who doesn't know just what is wrong with being a geek, this book should be a big help. It presents general narrative descriptions of geek characteristics and history and then completes this cavalcade by giving a series of bizarre anecdotes about the foibles of specific geeks. Suppose you went to sleep one night and suffered instant amnesia, waking up to find yourself trapped in the horrid body and life of a nerd? You look in the mirror and see a pale, skinny person with thick Coke-bottle eyeglasses and preposterously unappealing clothes. You must constantly be on the lookout for bullies, can't play sports, and have a miserable personality. Just to make matters worse, what if you are possessed by bone-crushing horniness, but no one attractive will give you the time of day? This is how many of us wake up every morning. It would seem to make the most sense to immediately make radical and thorough changes to divest oneself of nerdhood and to acquire the characteristics of a cool person. The elements of this redemption are obvious, the methods more elusive. How does one gain muscles in order to achieve a more average appearance? How does one choose decent clothes, get good at sports, get a tan, and learn some social graces? Perhaps Geek Redemption is the answer. Geek Redemption outlines and identifies in a humorous way, all of the many unsavory characteristics of geeks. It goes on to provide a tried and true pathway to de-louse oneself of geek characteristics and to re-emerge as a totally different person. Since geeks have very identifiable characteristics, it would seem to be immediately possible to begin the process of Geek Redemption by simply reversing those characteristics. The eager redemptee should begin by taking a shower, getting a haircut, shaving, burning his nerd rags, dressing for success, getting a tan, and building some muscles, among many other things. Once having begun this process, the redemptee is ready to begin constructing The Three Pillars of Geek Redemption. These are Presentation Redemption, Social Redemption, and Physical Redemption. Presentation Redemption encompasses the choice of clothes, grooming, and many personal accessories that fall in the same avenue as dressing for success. Nerds consistently make certain wardrobe blunders that can be easily corrected. Some of the more obvious ones include scroungy long hair, beards, or a pony tail; sandals; plaid madness; high-water pants over nerd fur; and polyester proliferation. Social Redemption includes decorum and comportment at work and how to deal with the unredeemed geeks around you. It also includes a better way to attract women. When you get right down to it, Presentation Redemption and Social Redemption, while both being necessary, can only take you so far. The pillar that puts reality into the whole process is Physical Redemption. Physical Redemption is the dimension of the physique. Physique is what gives clothes something to enhance. Improving the physique also improves the body's radiant sexual energy and attractiveness. The exercises involved improve coordination and posture. The process helps to change one's personality for the better and leads to enhanced self esteem and respect. All of these things reflect in better esteem from others. Bodybuilding in reasonable amounts produces an appearance that is exceptionally pleasing. Progressive resistance weight training is the approach to gain this appearance. The nerd's first goal is to achieve an appearance of normalcy. At that point, superiority becomes possible. Weight training is also excellent preparation for sports. Though they horrify the average nerd, sports also tend to enhance a person's attitude, self-possession, and physique. By far, most nerds are of the emaciated variety. Achieving a more normal appearance is beastly difficult for us. Nevertheless, it is possible. To achieve a normal appearance, the redemptee will strive to correct the typical nerd flaws that include pencil neck, beer gut, love handles, girly-man arms, sunken chest, bird legs, and buttlessness. When the redemptee is ready to push on to excellence, the desired characteristics include broad shoulders, a deep chest, tapered back, flat stomach, and muscular arms and legs. The reader is invited to drop in, to be entertained, and then to stay to progress along the path to Geek Redemption.Read More