Girlfighting: Betrayal and Rejection Among Girls Book

For some time,reality TV, soap-operas, and sitcoms have turned their spotlights girls who thrive on competition and nastiness. Few fairy tales lack the evil stepmother, wicked witch, or jealous sister.Cartoons feature mean and sassy girls who only become sweet and innocent when adults appear. How much do these portrayals affect the way girls view themselves? Psychologist/educator Lyn Brown scrutinizes the way our culture nurtures this sort of meanness in girls. She argues that the old adage "girls will be girls" gossipy, competitive, cliquish, backstabbing, and the idea that fighting is part of a developmental stage or a rite-of-passage, are not acceptable explanations. Instead, she asserts, girls are discouraged from expressing strong feelings and are pressured to fulfill unrealistic expectations, to be popular, and struggle to find their way in a society that still reinforces gender stereotypes and places greater value on boys. Under such pressure, in their frustration and anger, girls (often unconsciously) find it less risky to take out their fears and anxieties on other girls instead of challenging the ways boys treat them, the way the media represents them, or the way the culture at large supports sexist practices. Girlfighting traces the changes in girls' thoughts, actions and feelings from childhood into young adulthood, providing the developmental understanding and theoretical explanation often lacking. Through interviews with over 400 diverse girls, Brown chronicles the labyrinthine journey girls take from direct and outspoken children who like and trust other girls, to distrusting and competitive young women. She argues that this pathway can be interrupted and provides ways to move beyond girlfighting to build girl allies. By allowing the voices of girls to be heard, Brown demonstrates the complex realities girls face, helping us to better understand and critique the socializing forces in their lives and challenging us to rethink the messages we send them.Read More